Ya' Might Be A Dome Dweller If.....

Back in early November of 2015, I wrote a blog on my definitions of the four basic categories in which I classify people as - Doers, Followers, Dome Dwellers and Those People.  Since then, I've become a certified, bonafide 'Voting Judge' (that ought to give you nightmares).  And this new part-time job allows me even more opportunity to be with the general public and to observe their habits, however strange or deranged they may be.  I've always been a people watcher and I inherited this trait from my Indian mother, who would rather sit and watch people, because they are always so entertaining. 

Therefore, without further delay, here is my updated list on ways to determine if a person fits the category of 'Ya' Might Be A Dome Dweller If'.....

• The cake to celebrate your first wedding anniversary is made by Sara Lee.
• You proposed to your wife over a chili dog and Slurpee.
• Your rehearsal dinner was at Hooter's.
• The music played at your daughters wedding is performed on a banjo and juice harp.
• Family nicknames are derived from previous romantic relationships with farm animals.
• Deciding who gets the last piece of pie resembles arm wresting and kick boxing events.
• The wine's of choice for Aunt Ethel's wake include 4 Roses, Muscatel, Bally High, Annie Green Springs and Mad Dog 2020.
• Your grandfather always "finger tastes" multiple jars of sweet pickles and mayonnaise in the grocery store before placing the jars back on the shelf for purchase.
• The county Hazmat crews are regular visitors to your home.
• The CEO of Dollar General sends you a personal thank-you card every year for being such a valuable customer.
• You have four first names.
• You use the dryer as an oven.
• You play horse shoes with toilet seats.
• You go to Goodwill to meet women.
• You've ever clogged your vacuum cleaner with a small animal.
• You've ever made a golf bag out of PVC pipe.
• One of your sister's nicknames is Big Foot.
• Your daddy sits on the front porch in his underwear waving to everybody that drives by.
• Your dog's name is Coors.
• You can smoke a cigarette while taking a shower and never get it wet.
• Your neighbor dials 9-1-1 every time you use the bar-b-que grill.
• Four dogs wind up on the windshield when you slam on the brakes.
• Your life's ambition is to drive the feed truck at the local sale barn on auction days.
• Nobody will sit next to you at a sporting event.
• Your wife has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sporting event.
• Your wife has ever worn a tube top to a wedding or funeral.
• Opening the hood of your car requires a crow bar and a lot of luck.
• Your wife has an Elvis jello mold in her pantry.
• Three of the four shelves of your refrigerator are devoted for beer.
• Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Drive-In Theater.
• Taking your wife on a cruise means driving around the Dairy Queen.
• Anything outside the Lower 48 is "overseas".