Little Known Facts Of Life

As we go through life there are many things we read, see, hear and learn that enable us to know what the best solutions might be in various situations, and these pearls of wisdom are certainly handy later on in our lives.  For example, I'm sure most of us remember the Roger Miller song Can't Roller Skate In A Buffalo Herd or the infamous Will Rogers quote Never Squat With Spurs On.  That same care and methodology comes into play as we go through the aging process and here are just a few things to avoid along the way.

- A nose ring and bifocals;
- Thongs and Depends;
- Spiked hair and bald spots;
- A pierced tongue and dentures;
- Mini-skirts and support hose;
- Ankle bracelets and corn pads;
- Speedo's and cellulite;
- A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scare;
- Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor;
- Midriff shirts and midriff bulge;
- Bikini's and liver spots;
- Short shorts and varicose veins;
- In-line skates and a walker;
- Loose toupee while riding with the top down; and
- Preparation H lying next to the Poligrip on the night stand.

Never eat at a diner where the special is the same animal pictured on the nearest road crossing sign.